Wednesday 2 January 2013

So It Begins!

Today was the first day of Slimming World. The day of nervous and not knowing whether youre going to get on the scales or not... I did.

I was terrified actually, I'm not great in groups so I turned up More than 30 minutes early and chatted with our leader, who is lovely and made me feel at ease.

I decided I would join for the 12 weeks upfront package, which came to £49.50 which gave me free membership and 2 weeks free within the 12 so I was happy that I was saving, as well as knowing that I HAVE to stick with it now!

I didn't get to stay to group long but was given my new packs and the leader buzzed over the choices and I hopped on the scales to see a familiar number of 19.3 which I seem to have been for a while now, luckily Christmas hadn't pushed those figures right up! There's no point in being upset about the numbers this week I guess as that Will be the heaviest I am standing on those scales.. from now on the only way is down.

Have you ever taken such a long look at yourself and wondered how you'd never seen how bad it was before? well tracing out my silhouette really forced me to think about things and just how bad a state I am in.

Whilst walking around Salisbury's this evening I nearly collapsed. My joints are so unstable at the moment and my knees are buckling with my weight. Something that clearly needs fixing.

I ha vent decided how often I will be posting a photo/silhouette yet but its only fitting that I post my very starting weight so I can look back on progress *fingers crossed*.

Today I had a Muller light (toffee) yogurt, a satsuma, an apple, a couple of bites of a nasty tomato concoction that I gave up on! A <1 fat mug shot (Chicken and sweetcorn) then some vermicelli past with quorn cooked in fry light, soy sauce and 30g cheddar (HXa) and a Alpen Light bar for dessert (HXb).

Going to bed satisfied and ready to start finding good recipes to try out for the next week!

xxx

Sunday 30 December 2012

The Tough Truth.

I thought I should start a blog as with all New Years comes new promises of a new start weight wise, but this will be no ordinary weight loss blog (at least not one I would ever of seen myself writing!).

I'm currently in a size 24-26 and have a good 8 stone to lose to get to a 'healthy' bracket or so my doctor tells me! I have health problems that I will leave for a future post but to say I'm struggling because of my extra weight would be an understatement!

So many times I have (with all good intentions) been on a 'diet' that has either not worked at all (Weight Watchers) or worked temporarily and made me unwell in the process (Lighter Life and Cambridge) and I think that when you are so desperate to lose the weight you ll try anything that looks like a quick fix (BTW I'm not knocking anyone for which LL and Cambridge work for at all, it just didn't work for me personally) that when the idea of losing 1lb - 2lbs a week is mentioned it seems so slow. But now after years of yo yo diets I can see clearer my plan of action and have put the wheels in motion!

Starting next week I will be joining Slimming World! This is the 'diet' (way of life) I think will be best suited to me. I actually joined in 2011 early on but wasn't in the proper frame of mind, didn't understand the EE plan and after a few pounds loss I gave up and didn't go back, sadly.

I've applied for Gastric surgery 3 times now since 2010 and as much as my doctors, consultant and even surgeon agreed it was the best route (due to my health problems) the local PCT refused to fund the surgery leaving me very depressed and like there was no hope left.

I have one friend who I am very close to and she herself has been on Slimming World before and lost a substantial amount of weight and she makes it look easy! (I'm sure it's not at all!) but she inspires me alot and I know she will be there to support me on my journey and metaphorically (if not physically) slap me if I need it!

Secondly is the gym... now I have been a member of the gym in the past, even before my health problems started and have gone less than the number of fingers I have! So this time instead of fooling myself that I'd be in the gym every day for the next year, I have booked a course of personal training sessions. I am disabled, I cant walk far at all, I have no core strength and I'm on strong pain meds daily to get me through.

Luckily my gym is above my doctors and the instructors work with people like me who need close watching and guidance.. If I didn't say I was shitting myself I would be lying, but I'm more likely to stay on track and hit personal goals if I go once a week for an hour overseen by a personal trainer than if I was to go 3 times a week alone.
 Pain scares me and I know that it is going to hurt a lot the first couple of times (months even) as I don't currently do any exercise at all! But I really need to start building my core strength before I can start proper exercising and alongside the Slimming World diet hopefully I'll start to shed some of this weight that is aggravating my health problems so much.

I hope you will follow me and help with tips support as I know this is the biggest challenge of my life and I'm so determined not to let it be a one month wonder as I need my health back and to be the mum my little one deserves. I'm ready to make the jump!